We’re on each other’s team

It wasn't so long ago that I was obsessed with replaying in my mind what went wrong at my last job. After just three months there, I felt forced to quit because the environment was, to say the very least, becoming quite hostile. For a while, all the events that led up to this once unfathomable action pretty much haunted me. How did this happen? How did I get here? Or just ... why? I've literally never quit ANYTHING in my life. Not one thing, least of all a job, and trust me, I've had some pretty hideous and tortuous jobs in my lifetime. I'm just not the quitting kind (not that anyone in their right mind would describe themselves as such.) I've endured pathetic relationships with past boyfriends that were (and are) complete losers just because I'm the kind of person that seriously sticks it out until the end. I'm pretty much that way with everything and this is the reason why my sudden unemployment because I quit my job just slapped me in the face over and over again until recently. … [Read more...]

Finding a job in Chile – Take 2

Finding a job in Chile - Take 2

I have mad respect for those moms that choose to stay home with their kids. I'm about six weeks into my unemployment and being at home with little human is a job that requires some tough skin. After about two hours with her inside I need to set her free or she turns into a Tasmanian devil that just rips through our apartment, leaving remnants of what used to be a cozy place to live. Where does all this energy come from, I ask you? In any case, it's not so bad. She's mine and when I think back to the reasons why I actively chose to be in this unemployment scenario, even on the worst days I sit back and think "would I take it all back just to be working there again?" Then I immediately find myself in my "ooooom" place and realize that the best decisions have already been made. BUT (of course there's a but ... hello - don't you know me at all by now?) There are women who choose to be stay-at-home moms (or as I like to say, moms who work inside the home) and there are moms who … [Read more...]

Shake, shake, shake …

Shake, shake, shake ...

Poor Chile. What a bad rap it gets sometimes. As a seismically active country, Chile has its fair share of tremors ("temblores" as they're called here) and they occur almost every day in any given area. Granted, they're not all major quakes, but regardless of how "big" they may be, the fact remains that there are tiny earthquakes each and every day here. It's part of our everyday life and if you are thinking of visiting or living here, you need to KNOW this is an everyday occurrence. The latest earthquake was actually a "replica" or an aftershock and it occurred on April 2nd in Iquique, coming in at 7.6 on the Richter scale. The reason this aftershock was considered as such and not a full blown earthquake is because on April 1st the northern part of Chile was rocked by a magnitude 8.2 earthquake ... i.e. anything less than that is obvi an aftershock (so it would seem). Anywhere else in the world the 7.6 aftershock would have been labeled a full blown earthquake and a state of … [Read more...]

Old School

Old School

It's been almost a year and a half since my last blog entry. Where has the time gone? What have I been doing? What have YOU been doing (whatever - you probably aren't even around anymore! Sheesh!) I can't really tell you what's been happening in the last 12+ months over here at the bottom of the Earth, but let's recap what we already know: I'm an expat living in Chile since July 2009 (holy crap, that's FIVE WHOLE YEARS this year!), I got married, I went to grad school, I finished then finally started working here, got a bulldog, moved and then had a baby (which we all know wasn't all peaches and cream for me but now it's fine.) A whole lot has happened in between all this, most of which I've already written about in previous blog entries but there is a WORLD of ideas, thoughts, opinions, what have you, to share post-baby in a strange land. Although, granted, Chile isn´t so strange anymore but that doesn´t mean that being a parent and having a kid isn't strange. But that's a huge … [Read more...]

Another Turkey Day gone by

Another Turkey Day gone by

Another Thanksgiving came and went, completely and totally below radar. It was my third Thanksgiving spent living abroad and by no means does it get easier. Back when I had been in Chile a mere four months, I wrote a pretty positive post about all the things I was thankful for - sort of an ode to Thanksgiving despite being in a land far, far away. I reread that particular blog post and realize that I'm still thankful for all the things I listed three years ago and of course there are at least three things I'd add to said list: little human, Obi and my job. I'm not done being thankful and more so, being consciously thankful. However ... yes, there is a however. It's Thanksgiving and I'm alone. A-L-O-N-E, alone. Yes, little human is with me (and she's a presence to be reckoned with) but she's also six months old and at 9PM said little human sleeps. Yes, my tub of burning love, Obi, is also with me, but he's partial to sleeping anytime, anyplace and that means he's sleeping right now. … [Read more...]

Greatest Hits

Making a list, checking it twice ... via Chud.com

Right after I had the little human, I took to watching a WHOLE lot of the series "LOST." There is an episode late in Season Three of this twisted series entitled "Greatest Hits" and no, this blog post is not a review of this particular episode (which, if you're wondering, yes, is a good one.) Not that you should care, but in this episode a character dies and he knows beforehand when and how he's going to die. In preparation for this, he reflects on his life and proceeds to jot down his life's greatest hits - i.e. best or most memorable moments - on a piece of paper so that this little scrap can later be given to his lady love upon his death. The idea has motivated me to think back on my greatest hits thus far. Leaving aside the morbid reasons behind the tv character's motivation, I find it interesting to sit back and reflect on moments when I've felt particularly happy or fulfilled. Peaks that irrevocably warrant bookmarks between my chapters of life. In doing so, it helps me to … [Read more...]

Reality bites?

Reality bites?

Our culture, our society, the media, our peers and basically everything that surrounds us in the day to day of our little lives teaches us that babies are a happy thing. Babies are a miraculous event we should all be grateful for and everything associated with this is meant to be positive. I'm not here to disagree with all of this. After all, there's something unprecedented about having a baby and realizing that there's a little human being now alive because of you. But I'm writing this post because I need to point out that not everything is peaches and cream when a baby is born. I want to say this because, in light of what appears to be a baby boom where many people I know are having children right around the same time I did, I was forced to come to terms with the fact that my instant reaction to having a baby didn't quite mirror theirs. Theirs being the reaction we "expect," the reaction we've seen and the reaction we've been taught: sincere happiness, marvel and wonder, immediate … [Read more...]

My Labor Story (complete with Q & A)

My Labor Story (complete with Q & A)

I talked about it, I wrote about it, I griped about it. I feared for the day and lamented the day. I had anxiety everyday for the past two months over it and imagined the worst-case scenario with every article I read about it. Then finally, on April 30th, I lived through it. “It” being actually giving birth – me, the person who has had the recurring anxiety dream since I was a teenager that I all of a sudden go into labor without previously knowing I was pregnant. No joke, I spent years haunted by this dream so you can imagine what the thought of giving birth did to me in real life. At first I didn’t want to believe I was going into labor, but the pain, which felt like taking a brutal hit with a baseball bat right to my lower back was different from all the other pains I had experienced in the last two months of pregnancy. Still, my attitude was “sit and keep watch.” The reality was that I didn’t want to be going into labor. First of all, it was nighttime and if there was … [Read more...]

End of the road

End of the road

I've been consumed with doctor's appointments this week and visits to the clinica (hospital) for one thing or another. Why? I guess there comes a moment in some pregnancies where the woman's body just says "peace out" or "get this ball of baby out of here because it's literally cramping my style." This is what seems to be happening with me and as a result, my doctor has turned the hourglass over on this journey called pregnancy. And when I say hourglass, I mean that the days are numbered. By that I mean either tomorrow, Thursday, or next Monday, at the latest. Are you getting what I'm telling you? It means that by THIS TIME NEXT WEEK I'LL BE A MOM. Let's ponder that for a second.... When one first embarks on this journey (again, if you're like me), you spend a bit of time trying to wrap your mind around the fact that you're now one of those women who breeds. You spend an equal amount of time trying to come to terms with the fact that you can no longer enjoy the glass of wine … [Read more...]